The Life and Work of Shmuel Nissan Godiner
13.05.2014
Diana Cohen, a social worker, talks about her father’s cousin, the Yiddish writer Shmuel Nissan Godiner, and her efforts to translate his work.
To learn more about the Wexler Oral History Project, visit: http://www.yiddishbookcenter.org/tell…
Popular San Francisco Jewish Film Festival videos SFJFF Presents: The Tailor
12.02.2014
Culture and confusion meet on a Brooklyn street, in this hilariously charming tale of similarities amid diversity. Film directed by Gordon Grinberg
This short film is part of the San Francisco Jewish Film Festival short film showcase program, SFJFF Presents. To discover more great Jewish short films each month, join the SFJFF YouTube channel by clicking the red SUBSCRIBE button above.
For more details about SFJFF films and programs, visit http://www/sfjff.org.
Discovering Another Aspect of Jewish Culture: A Culinary Course In Israel
11.05.2014
Ethan Kaseff, 2012 January term Yiddish student, describes a culinary course he took while spending a year in Israel. To learn more about the Wexler Oral His.
The Spielberg Jewish Film Archive – Henrietta Szold
23.03.2010
Name: Henrietta Szold
Year: 1946
Duration: 00:32:02
Language: Hebrew
Abstract: A tribute to the founder of Hadassah.
The Spielberg Jewish Film Archive –
The 500 films, selected for the virtual cinema, reflect the vast scope of documentary material collected in the Spielberg Archive. The films range from 1911 to the present and include home movies, short films and full length features.
שם: הנרייאטה סולד
שנה: 1946
אורך: 00:32:02
שפה: עברית
תקציר: סרט הוקרה על הנרייטה סולד, המייסדת ארגון הדסה.
ארכיון הסרטים היהודיים על שם סטיבן שפילברג –
חמש מאות הסרטים שנבחרו עבור הקולנוע הווירטואלי משקפים את ההיקף הנרחב של החומר התיעודי בארכיון שפילברג. באתר ישנם סרטים משנת 1911 ועד ימינו אלה ביתיים, קצרים ובאורך מלא.
כל הזכויות שמורות לארכיון הסרטים היהודיים על שם סטיבן שפילברג ולאוניברסיטה העברית בירושלים 2010; דף הבית; http://www.spielbergfilmarchive.org.il
http://multimedia.huji.ac.il/
ESSAY: Disguised Blessings
QUESTION OF THE WEEK: Do We Do Mitzvahs for Ourselves or for G-d?By Yisroel CotlarIyar 15, 5774 · May 15, 2014
Question:When we do a mitzvah, are we doing it for ourselves or for G‑d? For example, if I give a dollar to a homeless guy, am I doing it for my sake—the act makes me feel happy and compassionate—or for G‑d? Are mitzvot bringing me closer to G‑d, or to happiness? Answer:I enjoyed reading your interesting and well-thought-out question! I like to think of a mitzvah as a multi-runged ladder. All the rungs are there, and the combination of all of them makes the ladder complete; the question is only which one we choose to focus on. The word mitzvah has a dual meaning: “commandment” and “bond.” At its essential level, a mitzvah is a connection with G‑d created by fulfilling His commandment. This is the ultimate aspect of a mitzvah—the highest rung of the ladder. That said, something that is essentially good will also be good on every other rung of the ladder. Let’s use eating kosher as an example. When one eats kosher, he is 1) physically strengthened, 2) spiritually refined, 3) gaining satisfaction and meaning in life, 4) earning reward in the world to come, 5) making this world a better place and 6) connecting to G‑d. And all of these are true. But first and foremost, it starts with the fact that eating kosher is being done as a commandment which establishes a connection with G‑d. The rest follow automatically. The Torah teaches a mitzvah should be performed lishmah (for its sake)—without incentives or personal considerations. It should be done simply because this is what G‑d wants. Yet this doesn’t happen overnight. The rabbis therefore taught that one can begin by serving G‑d with a personal incentive. Indeed, the Torah itself mentions the rewards that come through following the commandments. However, the goal is to eventually reach the level where one serves G‑d in a purely altruistic manner. And the same would apply to charity. The essential mitzvah is to give charity because this is what G‑d commanded. Will it make you feel good? Will it bring about tremendous reward? Of course! In fact, the Talmud says that one is even allowed to say, “I am giving charity in order that my son should be healed.” After all, the most important thing is that the deed should be done. Nonetheless, it is best when the mitzvah is done lishmah. Paradoxically, however, with regards to charity, the Rebbe explains that it must be given with feeling. It is not enough to simply give the dollar because that is what G‑d commanded; we are also commanded to empathize with our fellow’s plight and genuinely desire to be of assistance. And this feeling, too, must emanate from our desire to follow G‑d’s instructions. Yours truly, Iyar 14, 5774 · May 14, 2014 ESSAY: Disguised Blessings
My friend Aviva came to visit Chaya Mushka and me in the hospital. Just four weeks earlier my daughter was diagnosed with Trisomy 18, a chromosomal disorder. Only five to ten percent of babies with this condition survive their first year. “I just don’t understand why this would happen to you,” she said to me. We sat facing one another in the NICU. I held Chaya Mushka and kicked the rocking chair into motion. “You and Sholom Meir seem to be such good people . . .” “But what if we were chosen to host her? What if her soul selected us as her parents for its short mission on earth, then to return ‘home,’ unscathed and pristine?” The words slipped from my lips, still unprocessed: “What if she’s our blessing?” “But if you don’t listen to Me,” says G‑d, “I will direct upon you panic, inflammation, fever, disease and anguish. You will sow your seed in vain, and [if it does sprout,] your enemies will eat it . . .” (Leviticus 26:14,16). Harsh! And that’s not it. The Torah continues with close to another thirty verses filled with promises of retribution—they’re actually difficult to read. Surprisingly, Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi makes the following comment about the Torah’s harsh words: “In truth, they are nothing but blessings!” Blessings?! He then proceeds to explain many of the verses as blessings. For example, “Ten women will bake bread in one oven” (ibid. verse 26). In its simplest sense, this verse is referring to the extreme poverty that will afflict us if we abandon G‑d’s ways. But Rabbi Schneur Zalman interprets the verse as follows: We will meditate on the oneness of G‑d (the oven of “one”) with such intensity, that all our ten soul-powers will be consumed with a fiery love for Him. Then our Torah study (Torah is often referred to in the Scriptures as “bread”) will “bake” and marinate in this love.
Rabbi Schneur Zalman uncovers the hidden blessings hidden behind the guise of misfortune. To him, it was obvious and apparent that the curses must be taken beyond face value. Interestingly, Rabbi Schneur Zalman wasn’t the first person to see through apparently unkind wording. The Talmud (Moed Katan 9a) tells us the story of Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai, famed Mishnaic sage and author of the Zohar, who sent his son Elazar to receive blessings from two of his students, Rabbi Yonatan and Rabbi Yehudah. But instead of hearing from them blessings, he heard curses. “May it be G‑d’s will that you will sow and not reap!” they proclaimed, and then continued with a litany of unpleasant wishes. An astonished Elazar repeated to his father the rabbis’ curses. “Curses?” responded Rabbi Shimon. “Those were all blessings! “‘You will sow and not reap’ means that you will have children and they will not die . . .” And Rabbi Shimon proceeded to decode all the “curses,” patiently explaining to his son the blessings inherent within them. It was certainly quite clever for Rabbi Shimon to decode the riddles and expose the blessings. But why did the sages speak in such a roundabout way? Why didn’t they bless him in language that he could understand? Rabbi Schneur Zalman’s grandson, Rabbi Menachem Mendel of Lubavitch, asks just this question. He concludes that the sages’ blessings were of such a lofty and sublime nature that they couldn’t be expressed directly. They had to go through the medium of “bad” before they could be exposed as good. If G‑d is good and He orchestrates our lives with purpose and meaning, then there can be only two types of experiences that He generates: a) good things that we perceive as good; b) good things that we perceive as bad. And here’s the part that seems completely counterintuitive (or maybe not): the good that’s perceived as bad is in fact a more potent good.1 Compare your personal journal to your published autobiography. The autobiography probably makes a lot more sense to an audience of readers. But your journal is so raw and genuine, so you. When G‑d communicates with us from a place closer to His essence, we don’t understand Him clearly. Was that a hug? ’Cause it felt like a slap in the face . . .
In fact, the Talmud (Yoma 23a) tells us that people who are able to remain happy despite their suffering will merit to see G‑d in His full glory during the messianic era. These resilient people don’t let frustration and disappointment erode their belief that everything that comes from G‑d is good. Since they embrace all of G‑d—the part they understand, and the part they so don’t—they eventually experience the totality of G‑d’s light. They’ve proven that they can embrace even the most raw and intense parts of G‑d. So, how do we expose the sweet good that’s entangled in a bad wrap? The chassidic masters teach that by merely trusting that there is a potent kernel of good hidden in the pain, we begin to disassemble the screen that veils it. “Why did this happen to me?” There are two ways to ask this same question. One is rhetorical, a proclamation: “This is wrong and shouldn’t have happened to me.” The second is authentic: “I wonder why this is happening to me. How can this be good for me?” And just exploring the possibility of good draws it to the surface. To ask the second type of question, we need to train ourselves to look through the external trappings of an experience and capture its depth. Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai was clearly a man of unparalleled depth. He authored the Zohar, the primary book of Jewish mysticism. That’s why it was so natural for him to see the curse as a blessing. He didn’t need to reconcile the shell of the words with their inner meaning—to him the shell was completely transparent.
Rabbi Schneur Zalman authored the Tanya, the primary work of chassidic philosophy. Like Rabbi Shimon, he saw everything with profundity, plumbing the depths of any notion. That’s why Rabbi Schneur Zalman read the verses of admonition and immediately entered into their innermost understanding, where all is good, and where what we perceive as bad is in truth the higher expression of G‑d’s kindness. Like Rabbi Shimon, he didn’t have to train himself to see bad as good; to him it was as clear as the sun is bright. Studying chassidic teachings, the depth of the Torah’s wisdom, trains our eyes with incredible depth perception, and sensitizes us to see the good even when we’re disappointed.2 And nevertheless, let’s bless each other that we all be recipients of only good—and good that we perceive as good! Iyar 13, 5774 · May 13, 2014 PARENTING: 4 Steps to a Great Marriage
Today, lasting marriage is increasingly rare; approximately 50% of secular marriages end in divorce. While no one should have to suffer in an abusive or painful relationship,
divorce was never meant to be the solution to all marital problems. On the contrary, in a society that truly values marriage, institutions and individuals work hard to support couples, realizing that lasting unions give both adults and children the emotional and physical stability that is so essential to wellbeing. Indeed, Jews have always placed a very high value on marriage and family life, living within communities that actively support, encourage and facilitate the building of “faithful homes” that together make up a unified people. To a large extent, traditional Jewish couples are still succeeding—against the challenging backdrop of an unsupportive culture—in making their marriages work. This isn’t because they find marriage easier than other people do; they don’t. Rather, it is because their commitment to the institution—their appreciation of its spiritual, social, emotional and physical benefits—gives them the impetus they need to struggle through its inevitable challenges. Whether you’re ready to throw in the towel or just want to improve your marriage, here are four practical perspectives that can help your marriage survive and thrive: 1) Acceptance and GratitudeMaintaining a healthy, lifelong union requires acceptance, compassion, forgiveness and appreciation. Yes, you must work toward positive change, but you must also know when to let an issue go, when to give up the struggle and the desire to control, and accept what is. Along the way, you have to accept your own feelings of disappointment. Instead of focusing on what’s missing, it will help if you can reframe what you have in order to appreciate it more. A spouse’s socks on the floor is sure proof that you indeed have a spouse; instead of being fuel for a fight, it can be a reminder of blessing and good fortune. 2) Understanding and Accepting the Opposite GenderYes, I’m going to paint in broad brushstrokes here. There will always be plenty of exceptions, but there are certain gender differences that are worth noting. Men often have a shorter list of complaints than their wives do. Essentially, men just want their wives to be happy. They want to feel that their wives respect and admire them—way beyond the first year of marriage. They need their wives to communicate appreciation and warmth. When women are cold, critical and miserable, men feel like failures and start to withdraw. Men are far more sensitive to rejection than their wives might imagine, because they often fail to express their feelings in words. Instead, they may spend less time at home and say less. Or they may become more aggressive and irritable.
Women tend to start off sweet but then, due to disappointment, hurt and endless giving, find they have little desire or energy for indirect marital strategies. Instead they begin to make quick, direct attacks, getting straight to the point without taking time to strategize or soften communication. Or, if that fails, they fall into silent, angry depression. To break this attack/withdraw pattern, it’s important to see a marriage not as a win-lose situation, but as a win-win (or a lose-lose). For example, while it’s true that most men won’t look around the house and just figure out what needs to be done, the majority will certainly be willing to help out when simply asked clearly to do so. Instead of feeling resentful that he is only “helping,” the wife can choose to accept the “captain-of-the-ship” role in household management and delegate tasks to her good-hearted, willing life partner. For women especially, it helps to have a good friend, mentor, or therapist who supports this way of thinking. 3) CommunicationI’m surprised when I hear people say that they have basically given up on trying to have a good marriage, and they are instead focused on raising their children. If anything, your relationship with your spouse takes priority over your relationship with your children. Children are more perceptive than you may think, and they will learn how to act by watching how you and your spouse interact with each other. The good news is that good parenting techniques are really just excellent communication strategies. So, if you are careful to praise your kids generously, do the same for your spouse. If you minimize correction, criticism and complaints with your kids, do the same with your life partner. If you use “teaching moments” to make important points with children, then never negotiate with your spouse in times of anger. If you make it a point to show interest and understanding when your kids are speaking, do the same for your spouse. This is not to say that your spouse is just another “child,” but rather, apply the communication skills you have already cultivated. 4) Meeting Your Own NeedsYou are responsible for the quality of your life—not your spouse. Bring contentment and fulfillment to your daily existence by strengthening your relationship with G‑d,
learning powerful stress-management techniques, nurturing a circle of healthy personal relationships, finding meaningful and satisfying work, exercising, learning, growing emotionally, contributing to your community, and so on. The better you are at making your own life successful, the easier it will be to enjoy your marriage as the wonderful gift that it is meant to be. Since we believe that marriage is inherently valuable, necessary, healthy and good for all concerned, let’s invest ourselves fully enough to actually succeed at it. This has always been the Jewish way, and so many of us and our children have reaped the benefits of the secure embrace of family life.
Iyar 13, 5774 · May 13, 2014 VOICES: A Big Gray Lump Called Pain By Eve There’s a big gray lump called Pain living in my heart. I had initially refused to let him in when he first jumped in that direction, so he climbed up to my brain and messed around there, and that was pretty dangerous. He was red-hot and fiery, and he burned some pretty vital allies of mine, like logic and reason, and there was no way I could outwit him. I tried ignoring him, but it was impossible to escape his heat. He cackled gleefully as I got burned, and I’m pretty sure I burned others, too. I tried beating him, but he kept coming out on top. I then tried starving him, drowning him, soothing him, confusing him, distracting him and shouting at him, but every time, this Pain won.
I realized I wouldn’t be able to rid myself of him, so, reckoning he’d be safer in my heart than in my mind, I let him back down. But though I’d accepted the Pain in my heart, I didn’t like him there at all. At least, however, with my brain back in session, I was able to cool his fires, and eventually he ceased to be a red-hot monster, and he morphed into a big gray lump. A big gray lump called Pain. And I don’t like him. His presence bothers me. He nudges me, trying to make me sad. His presence teases me. He nudges me, trying to make me mad. He follows me everywhere I go, doing his best to drain me. I refuse to let him overtake me, but the reality is that there isn’t enough room for both of us, and I’m starting to choke. Since ignoring him didn’t work, I attempted the opposite and became obsessed with trying to talk him to death. But that didn’t succeed either. Whether he liked the negative attention or whether it diminished him slightly, I’ll never know, because he’s still around and as bullying as ever. He’s a quiet bully, but a bully nonetheless. Some days he takes up less space than others. But since lately nobody has seen him, they all think he’s entirely dead. Sometimes, the more he pushes me, the brighter I smile. And the people who have met him in the past sigh in relief that he’s long gone. And sometimes that makes me feel a bit frustrated, but other times that delights me. It’s a victory of sorts. Usually, he’s predictable in when he’s going to speak up loudly. Certain languages, scents and words draw him out quickly. He shoots out from where he’s crouching and, his smirk reverberating with my heartbeat, he grabs my heart. He grabs it so suddenly and so tightly that in order to breathe, I must immediately apply intense mental focus to peel his fingers off one by one and put him back in his place. I can accomplish this only when I am calm. Once, I would freeze in fear, rapidly breathing shallow frightened breaths while vehemently denying his existence. But that would only make him squeeze harder, as if to prove that he was real. So, now I know to acknowledge his appearance and just surely and steadily remove myself from his clutches. Yes, I am truly the master of this big gray lump called Pain. He cannot rule me; I am not my pain. Yes, he is in me, but I am the master. And as master, I determine that I may as well benefit from this Pain that’s not leaving. Maybe I can climb higher in life by stepping on him. This big gray lump called Pain can give me a tremendous boost if I topple him to the side and then jump right on him with confidence. So I take a deep breath and thank
him daily for the fires he’s scoured me with, because of the powerful cleansing that’s given me. I recognize and humbly appreciate that all the crushing he’s doing to me is squeezing out my best self that’s hidden quite deep inside me. I have been deflated from his stabbing, and now have room for many others and much more in my life. I am utilizing my Pain to create such tremendous positive change that the big gray lump living in my heart deserves a second name. I call him “Good Pain.” And I share that with a few people close to me. And they’re all really relieved now, because they had known that the Pain hadn’t left before—that type of Pain stays for a while!—but now that I revealed the whole process and I said it’s good, they can relax and even rejoice. And I rejoice with them, and I smile with pleasure and gratitude at how far I’ve risen, but no matter what I do, no matter how hard I try, deep inside, all the time, the big gray lump called Pain lives on. And that’s okay. That’s okay because I was never promised a life without Pain; I was only assured that G‑d would give me the tools to rise above him.
ETHICS OF OUR FATHERS: Humility: Two Definitions (Chapter 4) Iyar 14, 5774 * May 14, 2014
YU Presents Revolutionary Online Torah-Learning Program … 10-minute video presentations show different YU Torah scholars introducing intriguing questions relating to the Jewish holidays, with viewers being …
Jewish Literary Festival and Jewish Book Awards Once upon a time, Toronto’s two major Jewish book events, the Jewish Book …Jewish Music Week in Toronto presents Afternoon Tunes – Abi Gezunt, …
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